Roses

Unsaid so much unsaid

If I could I would I say to myself

Knowing how the words won't fall

when you ask them to and

How I'll dress the tattered home up

into something...

A moment of respite

because I can't say to you

not you

How I dreamed of pulling myself apart

and felt a coward when I couldn't push my fingers through my waking flesh

and how I woke up screaming

knowing I had forgotten the face of love

and would be blind

Or how the rain filled up my lungs and I was thankful that the pressure crushed the howling into blessed, silent, pain and how

I fear the dimming in your eyes and how you'd hesitate to touch me

If I said to you my insides

and presented you my roots

I'd rather you remember fondly

How the light shown through the window

And that I always had a smile when you arrived

I'd rather roses in the space twixt you and I